The moments in between
by dstarlight
Summary: It's the moments in between that grab you. There's so much to say and so much to hold onto. Olicity.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N** So this was just thrown together. I'm still trying to get a feel for the characters, but I just had to get this out. I've fallen in love with Olicity and this needed to be written. Each part starts and ends with a different set of lyrics. I'll list the songs in order at the end. Please be kind and reveiw, constructive criticism is welcome :)

**Disclaimer** None of it belongs to me. I'm just playing in the CW sandbox ;)

* * *

_I pray that you will find peace of mind_

It's two against two; Oliver and Sara against Diggle and Roy. It's all heavy breathing and harsh movements, too quick to keep up. Not that Felicity is paying much attention. Her fingers continue to tap away at her keyboard, trying not to think about how things can change in the blink of an eye. Felicity can admit that she secretly misses how it used to be; where it was solely a team of three. Yes, it may have been hard, and it may have taken more time, but that was okay because they were trying to create something great. Good things never seem to last long though; all they do is become more complicated. Complicated is not something Felicity wants right now, her head's too full.

She rebuilt the foundry to stand for something, to symbolize a new beginning. To provide a safe haven if needed. It was stupid now that she thought about it, but it was also the first place where she felt like she truly belonged. How clichéd is that, it just makes it even more ironic that it now represents nothing but a vacant hole. It's a total stranger to her now. Once again she's on the outside looking in. _She just doesn't fit. _

Roy grunts and his body crashes to the ground hard.

"Nice one, Ollie."

It's an instant reaction, her eyes close in response to something that should mean so little. How she wished to just block it all out.

Voices.

Words.

Breaths.

Her throat still clenches slightly when Sara uses that name.

Ollie.

The playboy.

The heartbreaker.

The boy who refused to grow up.

_Oliver_.

Now, he is Felicity's hero, she's really hoping he'll make an appearance sometime soon.

Breathing deeply she resumes her typing. What is it that they say; you can't stop the world from spinning. Well, Felicity can't stop her heart from wanting. Although, it's about time to start wanting something that's not so out of reach.

Message received, Smoak. Girl Wednesday it is.

_and I'll find you another time_

_I'll love you another time_

* * *

_say something I'm giving up on you_

"What were you thinking?" Oliver's voice radiates around the foundry and Felicity winces at the sound. It's an angry, rumble and it echoes harshly.

"I'm sorry; I thought I could handle it. He's a tech whizz like me; I didn't consider, I thought I could get through to him, that he'd see reason if I could just explain. Lesson definitely learned on that one." If he glared at her any more she'd turn into ash right there on the table. Never had she seen Oliver so mad; nearly getting him squashed by a bus didn't even compare to this. "Please, can we just move on? In case you haven't noticed he fried the entire system, for which I am _grudgingly_ impressed. Never the less some serious clean-up has to be done and I need to start soon before I freak out at how my babies were collateral damage in….." Her head droops. "I don't even know what this was."

"I don't care, Felicity. Do you have any idea what could have happened to you if Sara hadn't gotten there in time." The quiet rasp of his voice was actually worse than his yelling. Oliver's eyes didn't yield, they pinned her in place and she couldn't move. The last thing Felicity ever wanted to do was disappoint him. It seemed to be a constant struggle lately, she feels like she's losing grip of everything that made them…._them_.

Sometimes Felicity thought Oliver expected too much. Or maybe she expected too much of herself?

"Ollie, lay off. She's fine." Sara interrupted, sending a small smile Felicity's way as she made her way over to the furious man standing a few feet away. Her steps were light and easy, her hand skimming his shoulder as she reached him. It was a natural caress. _Familiar_. Felicity foolishly wondered if the touch soothed him_. _Was Sara able to calm his demons while still fighting her own? If so she's a stronger woman than Felicity would ever be. Then again, that wasn't much of a shocker.

A bitter chuckle catches Oliver's throat as he throws his arm out, it's a jerky action and Felicity is caught off guard by it. While not always graceful Oliver's movements are always coordinated. He knows his own body; he uses it to its utmost ability. To know he's off kilter is an uneasy feeling. Oliver is always in control.

"You call that fine; I just had to watch Diggle sew her up and wipe away the blood as she bled out across the foundry floor so don't tell me she's fine." He shrugs Sara off to stalk towards the woman that hasn't left his gaze since the moment he charged in. He suddenly reminds Felicity of a caged panther she once saw when she was five years old; all tension and frustration. Oliver is barely holding it in. His face tight, his agitation conveyed by the relentless ticking of his jaw.

She suddenly feels very tired; she just doesn't have the energy to counter Oliver's verbal spars today. Her body is drained and her shoulder hurts like hell. Seriously, if that was what a graze felt like she couldn't fathom how Digg and Oliver stayed coherent through an actual gunshot wound. _Stupid, macho men_. She didn't care how good their abs were, it wasn't fair. Although, she was secretly proud of the minor battle scar; not that she'd ever voice that out loud. _Ever_.

"I'm sorry." It's all she can give him.

He exhales; it's a long and slow sound that tugs at the very centre of her. Cobalt eyes once again trap hers. "_Felicity_, sometimes that's not enough."

Her breath stills and she bites down hard on her bottom lip. Sadness is quickly becoming her new best friend. She really has no words for what she's currently feeling. Somehow she finds them anyway. "And you would know all about that. Right, Oliver?"

She doesn't miss the flicker of hurt before he can shield it over, she walks away regardless.

Felicity thought they were better than this.

_I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you_

* * *

_open up next to you _

_and my secrets become your truth_

Felicity stops reading as someone sets a mug down, the smell of rich coffee instantly hitting her. She was only halfway through the morning's schedule. Her brain already thinking of ways to condense it down, to make Oliver's day run a bit more smoothly and in turn her own. That's why she's surprised to see his face when she looks up from the screen. He's leaning casually against her desk, hands shoved deeply into his pockets. It's as if he didn't have a thousand things that needed his attention today, which being his EA Felicity knows that isn't the case.

He's a little too close for comfort and Felicity would love to know why he has to encroach on her space like that. She can acknowledge that the past few weeks have been awkward to say the least, and Oliver knows it too. He's not a stupid guy. That's why he's been keeping his distance, they both have. It wasn't something she intentionally set out to do. With Oliver Felicity's not so sure, since she told him about Thea and how his mother had once again lied to him; things have been strained. There's also the whole thing with Sara that she's not _supposed_ to know about.

_Note to Oliver though, if he decides to have sex at the foundry there are cameras running twenty four seven. He really should have known that, its common sense. It is the secret lair of Starling City's very own vigilante after all. Maybe she should have sent out a memo. Either way, Felicity saw the event in all its sweaty glory (audio unfortunately included.)_

A lot of ice cream and wine was needed afterwards.

Not sure exactly what Oliver is up to Felicity simply raises an eyebrow. "What's that for?"

Oliver shifts forward, his hand almost reaching out before he stops himself. Her eyes watch as he reins himself in, she literally sees the decision as he makes it_. He won't even touch her now?_ The hand falls loosely by his side; clearing his throat he croaks out. "_One_."

It's so quiet Felicity nearly misses it, but the word sparks something. Recognition hits fiercely and she freezes. Her mouth parts but nothing comes out.

Oliver just looks at her, in that way of his. He always has that way, specifically for her. The slight twitch of his lips causes something in her to ache. Why can't he be horrible when she wants him to be?

"You look like you needed it."

He's gone before she can even form a reply. The glass that separates them is just another cruel reminder of how different their worlds will always be.

_and the distance between that was sheltering me comes in full view_

* * *

_In the moment we're lost and found_

Felicity was about to flip the switch when she hears footsteps coming down the stairs. Glancing up she sees Oliver making his way over. The tuxedo he's wearing lets her know that he'd gone to the banquet that Isabel had insisted he attend. The fact that he was at the foundry told Felicity he hadn't stayed long. Knowing that she'd have to deal with an irritated Isabel on Monday morning was not a comforting thought, the image of a hissing python aptly came to mind.

Why was he here?

"I thought I told you to take the night off." There's censure in his tone but it's paired with that gentle teasing that's been sorely missing from their interactions lately. There's been a air that something is broken. One that if their honest, neither of them has any idea how to fix.

With a tilt of her head she points towards the computers. "It took longer than I thought to run all the diagnostics, I was about to call it a night." She idly trails her fingers along the table's edge, tensing when his presence hems her in from behind. Shuffling around she's met by an intense set of eyes. Way too serious for that time of night.

_She really needed to talk to him about boundaries. _

"I miss you." It's so unexpected that Felicity has to take a few seconds to let the words sink in. Oliver never lets anyone know what he's thinking. So the fact that he's openly confessing something so personal is highly unusual, she suddenly wants to know if anything happened at the banquet.

All she can do is smile wanly. "I haven't gone anywhere." Even as she speaks the words she knows they're weak.

Oliver exhales. "_Felicity_….."

Oh Oliver, why did he continue to utter her name that way? It makes her think there's actually a chance that...….

"You have no idea how far you've actually gone." Oliver takes a step back but she's too shocked to register what he's doing. He's half way across the room before she realises he's no longer near. Oliver's revealed far more than she ever thought he could. It's going to take some time to process, to figure out what the hell is happening between them.

"Going to beat something senseless?" She calls out, willing him to turn round. He's heading for the showers, his hands roughly tugging at his tie. It doesn't take a genius to know what he's planning to do with the rest of his night.

"You know me well." Is all Felicity hears, but again it exposes so much.

It takes only a few seconds for her to come to a decision. So instead of going home to the latest Game Of thrones and a glass of fine merlot, she sits down and quickly reboots her system. In more ways than one she muses.

Its ten minutes later when he reappears, his body coming to a halt when he notices her sitting there. He's wearing his work out pants and nothing else, feet bare and soundless against the floor. Oliver's always been a sight to behold and Felicity's never been afraid to look. With everything the way it is right now she makes it a point to take all of him in; blue eyes snare blue never wavering from the other. She's telling him, no showing him that she's there and no matter what happens that's not going to change. He's nearly crippled by the relief he experiences.

Tilting his head Oliver gives that rare upturn of lips. Then as Felicity said he would proceeds to beat a dummy senseless. All to the rhythmic tapping of his partner.

_I just wanna be by your side_

* * *

**A/N** If inspiration strikes I might add to this, we'll see how things go. Any mistakes I apologise for, it was all done very quickly. Now the first song is Explosions by Ellie Goulding, second is Say Something by Great Big World, third is Breathe Again by Sara Bareilles, and the fourth is Wings by Birdy. Try listening to the songs as you're reading, each one helped me write this.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N** So after the last episode I've been working on this, took a while to get it right. It's a bit different from the first chapter as it's only one scene with Ben Howard's Promise weaving throughout.

**Disclaimer **Doesn't belong to me, I'm just borrowing Olicity :)

* * *

_Shelter as we go….._

"Oliver, what are you doing here?"

Felicity was shocked; her sleep addled brain was trying to compute and failing horribly. He could not be standing there; it didn't make any sense to her. Felicity took in his dampened hair, her mind faintly registering the pitter patter of rain against the windows. His leather jacket was clinging to his body, apparently doing little to protect him against the downpour outside. He had no reason to be at her door. If anything he should either be at the mansion trying to repair the damage that Slade had wrought against his family or with Sara strategizing their next plan of action.

"Can I come in?"

_And maybe, just maybe I'll come home_

Nodding her head Felicity stepped aside, welcoming Oliver Queen for the first time into her inner sanctum. As he stepped inside a slicing bolt of self-conscious hit, a million, trillion butterflies were doing whirlwinds in her stomach. Seriously, she felt like she was going to throw up which was completely stupid and really not how Felicity wanted the entire interaction to go down. This was her home, a place where everything that she was and everything that she kept hidden and guarded was on display. Her whole life was here; even if that was kind of depressing and definitely a little sad Felicity wouldn't have it any other way. More than anything Felicity wanted Oliver to accept all of her.

Would she rather have done it while she wasn't standing in her snoopy pyjamas? Sure, but what was a girl to do when it was two o'clock in the morning and an emotionally eviscerated man landed on her doorstep. A man she admired so much, who had often been the cause of many glasses of wine but who had her hope and a friendly ear whenever he needed.

Her eyes tracked him as he surveyed her apartment, seeing his lips twitch as he took in her Hermione figurine that sat atop a collection of Buffy comics. She was a geek and not afraid to admit it, Buffy and Hermione got her through the dreaded years that were puberty. Oliver picked up the figurine, his eyebrows rising as he looked at her.

Could the ground just swallow her up now, please?

Felicity folded her arms, her toes curling against the hardwood floor. "Don't judge."

With a slight chuckle Oliver placed the object right back where it was; his eyes softening as he did. And then as if being pulled to it he gravitated towards the couch. His body collapsed on contact; a sigh slowly escaping as he did.

_It was that sigh that did it. _

It was mixed with so much, everything and nothing. Weeks of relentlessly pursuing an enemy that used to be called a brother. A time wrapped up in nothing but lies and empty actions, betrayals and harsh words.

Felicity continued to watch as Oliver ruthlessly worked his neck. A habit she usually saw when he was highly frustrated and generally thinking too much.

"Is Thea Okay?" Felicity broke the silence, her voice quiet against the lashing of the rain. She should really turn a light on, the darkness was making the scene way too intimate for the type of relationship they had; but Felicity didn't want to budge. Any sound or movement would ruin whatever had descended upon her apartment. Oliver somehow needed this time. For some reason that Felicity couldn't fathom he apparently wanted it to be with her.

Oliver breathed out hard, shaking his head. "I don't know."

Knowing how much that pained him, how much Thea meant to him, Felicity wanted to say something that would help. Something profound and wise, but she was coming up short. There was nothing that would take away all the hurt and guilt Oliver was feeling.

Nothing at all.

Felicity ached for all that had happened and everything that she couldn't do.

"She'll forgive you, it may take some time but I'm positive that she will."

Slowly rising up he stepped forward; his body so close she could breathe him in. That personal space issue still hadn't been broached. "Why are you so sure?"

Felicity lips couldn't help but curl, a faint smile greeting an almost broken man. "You're her brother, Oliver. And yes sometimes you make mistakes but at the end of the day that doesn't matter. She loves you and you're her family. She's always going to love you."

There was an unspoken truth to that statement. It wasn't just Thea who would forgive and love him. Felicity really wished Oliver would start to see that there were people he could rely on, trust.

_Who am I, darling to you?  
Who am I?  
_

"I can't protect everyone while Slade's still out there."

_He needed to stop thinking that way. He was going to get himself killed if he did._

"No one's asking you to. We're all in this together, just like Digg said earlier. You're not alone, Oliver."

Felicity could see every argument, refusal running through his mind. It all flashed in quick concession through his eyes, and then suddenly they were blank. Felicity hated it when Oliver did that. At times he could be so difficult to read, but when he purposely shut you out…..

_It was beyond exasperating._

Oliver licked his lips, his eyes piercing. "I'm going to be completely honest with you; I don't want you anywhere near this."

_Gonna tell you stories of mine  
Who am I?_

"Well that's too bad because I'm going to be there every step of the way."

He inhales harshly and begins to pace, the floors creaking with every step. "I don't feel comfortable with you getting in the line of fire, not after what happened with Thea."

Felicity pursed her lips, not liking one bit what Oliver was implying. No way, no how was he going to enforce what was bubbling in that rash, thick headed brain of his. "There's a big difference between me and Thea. Slade knows what she means to you, I'm effectively a no body. Heck, I'm not even your assistant anymore, thanks for that by the way." Felicity throws out the sarcastic gibe, her ire rising with every word.

The look he gives her says it all. Its annoyance and anger, affection mixed with sadness; its fondness and laughter. It's so many things that never have to be uttered because they're always there.

"Felicity, you are more important than you think."

With a roll of her eyes she looks away, feeling too much. "And I've been fine since Slade decided that being undead really wasn't working for him."

"Digg's been on guard duty ever since Slade showed up." The way he said it, mentioned like it wasn't even relevant, well it certainly wasn't helping calm Felicity down.

"I'll give you a free pass tonight but don't think I won't be shouting at you for that tomorrow." How can things go from one extreme to the other where Oliver's concerned? He always manages to blur those stupid lines.

When she sees how exhausted he looks. The sharpness of his eyes dulled from the fear and reprieve of the day, his body weighed down but somewhat light from his conflictsand decisions. Felicity lets go of the irritation.

And it makes her answer easy and instant to his faltering question.

_Who am I, darling for you?  
Who am I?_

"Can I stay?"

"Yes."

The appreciation in his eyes is strong; it flares briefly before Oliver heads back to the couch, his form engulfing it. So somehow it's as simple as that. Then again it always seems to be the way with them.

"My couch isn't the cosiest." Felicity points out, however trivial that might be.

He gave her his regular turn of the lips. "I've slept on worse."

And she suddenly felt like an idiot. Of course he had. He was trapped on an island for five years, nothing there but sand and rocks. Oh, and who could forget the landmines. Can't forget those!

Felicity could only shake her head. "You should get some sleep."

_Gonna be a burden in time, lonely  
Who am I, to you?_

After giving him a blanket and making sure he was comfy Felicity was looking forward to sinking into cold sheets and letting her mind succumb to sleep. However she was stopped by his voice. The raspy sound in the darkness ironically made her feel safe.

"Are you mad at me?"

Felicity inched her way back to him, not quite understating his meaning. "For what?"

Propping himself up on his elbows Oliver looked straight at her. Even in the blackness she knew where his stare was focussed. Felicity would know Oliver's stare anywhere. _She felt it_.

"For every decision I've been making lately. How I handled Roy and Thea. The fact that you're now out of a job, the very one you were demoted to because I needed a girl Wednesday."

"It's Friday," she couldn't help but correct.

Oliver sighed. "Felicity."

And because he said he had to be honest, because she doesn't want to lie to him. Felicity tells him the truth. "Yes, I'm mad at you. But that doesn't really mean anything."

Felicity knows he's frowning, trying to decipher words and meaning, but Felicity's too tired to wait for him to figure it out. She also doesn't want him to think that she doubts him in any way. "Being mad at someone doesn't mean you're not there. I'm still here, Oliver. In case you were wondering."

Oliver haltingly clears his throat "Good to know."

It's a conversation they've had before and it's probably one they'll have again. All felicity knows is she will keep saying those words. Keep reminding Oliver of their truth. Until maybe one day he'll begin to believe them himself.

Smiling to herself Felicity leaves Oliver to get some much needed sleep.

_Who am I, darling to you?  
Who am I?_

_I come alone here  
I come alone here_


End file.
